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The 4-Hour Work Week and Timothy Ferriss  

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Old 10-09-2009, 06:48 AM
luiscongdon@msn.com luiscongdon@msn.com is offline
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Default My girlfriend doesn't like my 80/20

When I told my girlfriend about cutting my work hours so I can focus on my 80/20 and focus on LD, she responded, "Sounds like you don't want to grow up. Like you just want to play. What about being realistic, what about family and the future?"

She continued, "Be realistic." I cringed and I replied, "Being unrealistic is what makes two people love each other, what makes you a good mother, and what allowed you to get a home during a time when the economy is not so good." She was quiet.

The next day I spoke to my boss--asked to work less hours. She said go for it. For me this is slightly scary because it means lower paychecks. I have compensated by posting my car for sale and am moving to a smaller place to lower the rent. What could happen? Less pay, harder to pay bills, and more disapproval... Definitely worth trying to live out my LD.

I started the creation of my muse. I know it is definitely in need. wish I knew an investment Angel. I am the idea generator, how do I create money off just my ideas? My mind was made to make money--in grade school I was quit a business man, too bad it wasn't always legal.

Just a question. How can I use Parkinson's law on something I don't know anything about?


I did the dreamline too. Maybe you can give me some feedback.

So, as I sign out and finish this post. One more thing, anyone who needs a friend to help them not become that old bald man in the convertible let me know. I'm that guy.

LD and Elimination is like Allegory of the Cave-- the story Socrates tells to illustrate what happens when one person discovers truth and tries to tell everyone else about it. They ostracize him and eventually kill him. People probably won't like you or maybe just your ideas when you begin to propose less work, more play, and the whole 4hww lifestyle.

Last edited by luiscongdon@msn.com; 10-09-2009 at 06:57 AM.
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Old 10-09-2009, 08:09 AM
roe_g roe_g is offline
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It sounds like your girlfriend may be the same as some girls I've known. They seem to insist on conforming life to what they have imagined. She has grown up knowing adult life to be a 9-5 grind, and anything else is inexcusable lazyness. OR She needs you to have a normal job to have a sense of financial security. Either way, try to explain to her the low risk nature of your indeavors. Gently let her know that you consider time spent with her far more valuable than any of the material possessions you could otherwise purchase with that money. If she doesn't come around, you may have to make the hard choice of deciding if she truly is the one for you.

I always welcome new friends.
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Old 10-09-2009, 11:47 AM
captaink captaink is offline
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Hmm...

My wife used to be like this.

Work 9-5, or longer, be extremely obedient to superiors, fit into the working class mold at all costs, including going to work half-dead.

Now, after 12 years with me, she reduced her hours at work and is looking to fill her free time with her own pet projects and some charity work.

What I did? Nothing.
I lived my life the way I want to and we grew together. She saw that I am not a bad person and I used a lot of my free time with strange projects that led to success later on, AND I used it to have a great time with her.

So .. she is coming around, which your girl might do as well.

As for your other question -Ideas are worth NOTHING. Only an idea with an implementation (however rickety) will convince anyone to give you money. or - on the legal side - is able to be protected.

::captaink::
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Old 10-09-2009, 10:15 PM
jakediddy jakediddy is offline
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My wife responded the same way. I'm pretty sure it's because of the "get rich quick" aura floating around the concept. It can mask itself as instability to others in conversations, I've learned.

To reassure her that I wouldn't sell our souls or do anything without thought to the consequences, I promised her that I would always confirm my intent to purchase an item or service (for muse purposes anyway) with her before I go ahead and make the purchase (I have never considered that rule for buying lattes at coffee shops, I wouldn't want to be cut off from my happy little addiction). I was a little worried she wouldn't give me a chance to spread my wings, but she respects my ambitions. When I told her I would like to buy hosting services and a domain name and I gave her a price of $80 to $130, she said "oh, I thought it would be more" and was fine with the idea. She's more concerned with higher-priced expenses that could hurt our credit or stretch out our credit card and loan payments.

I do agree that my wife, like other spouses mentioned, is stuck in the 9-5 idea of deferred retirement and stability via consistent hours and employment. I am going to lead by example rather than argue - by starting with low-cost muses and working up.

Tim's suggestion of taking a step back and saying to yourself "if I lost everything, how would I get back my old life?" works well for single people, but significant others and spouses generally don't like the idea of the other person taking such a radical approach to life, unless they have the same mentality already.
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Old 10-10-2009, 01:49 AM
Marcie Marcie is offline
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Perhaps they (women) could read the book and then give their opinion?
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Old 10-10-2009, 04:14 PM
jakediddy jakediddy is offline
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She won't read it, I've suggested it before.

She reads fiction, whereas I generally read business, web development, and investing books. And a little Terry Pratchett.
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Old 10-16-2009, 05:18 PM
Peter Bowen Peter Bowen is offline
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Women are genetically programmed to seek out opportunities to reproduce with strong males. (Ladies, don't shout me down - this has been going on since cave man times). This instinct explains why ugly engineers get married to hot women. It's behaviour learned over many generations and there to ensure the survival of the fittest.

Imagine how the woman who has chosen a mate (you) now feels when suddenly you decide not to turn into your mom and dad. Her genes are now in danger of extinction.

Albert Hammond sung about it back in the 70's
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Old 10-17-2009, 03:46 AM
Marcie Marcie is offline
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I agree, Peter. Looking for a provider is certainly a genetic disposition, combined with a cultural understanding of what a provider is. Tim does mix that up a bit
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