My Muse - college-genius.com - feedback please

[mindsweeper]

I have got my test page up for my first muse. I have very little experience in web design and sales in general, and any feedback anyone can provide would be most helpful. I would like to get some opinions on the product, website, and sales letter prior to testing adword ads. From what I have seen in this forum, there appears to be some excellent critical feedback given around here which is exactly what I need at this point!

Thanks in advance for your thoughts and comments.

http://www.college-genius.com

[Drew Kime]

Break up the large block of text at the top. I was halfway into the second sentence when I skipped ahead to see what you were offering. And I want to help you with this thing. A potential customer would have probably clicked away.

There's some good stuff in there, though. You're defining the pain, now you need to show how you'll alleviate the pain.

Your bullets are way too low. They're pretty good. As soon as you define the pain, hit the reader with those benefits.

Your screenshot of the cover sucks.

Don't use the word "utilize". Blecch.

List a price.

Some of your benefits (in the second bullet list) are actually features. eg: "Study tips & techniques".

And just a totally random comment: I couldn't help thinking about Ned's Declassified. If you don't know what that means, you don't have any kids around who watch Nick.

[webgal]

You might want to proof read the headline. Comprehensive.


Supercharge your college experience with this comprehensive guide!

The visual is way to small and no one can read it. I really like the banner and the courier font and the colors.

[lolpie]

Also the Paypal button on the right hand side is way too small, but maybe that's just me.

[jjfisher]

Im a college student and I think $30 bucks for an ebook is really spendy. You can go to the book store and get an actual idiots or for dummies book for under $30. I would say $10 would be reasonable.

[mindsweeper]

Thanks everybody for your feedback. I will get to work on improving the site and take all of your comments into consideration. Meanwhile if anyone has any additional thoughts please post them.