Rediscovering your passions?

[robinsoncrusoe]

Hi. This is my first post, and I'm looking to do some brainstorming for ideas.

I recently graduated law school in the top 5% of my class from a pretty decent T1 and have been working for 2 years in a firm and I've known for some time it's not for me. Law school was hard, but interesting, provoking, and challenging - Work is anything but. But law was the only goal I had since I was a kid. I was good in school so my parents pushed for law. I should have pushed back. I gave law school the benefit of the doubt. And I gave the firm I work for the benefit of the doubt. But it's not for me. Unfortunately, I don't know what I would like to do in lieu of law. I wish I had taken more time to know myself more honestly while growing up instead of just deferring to the decisions of those in authority over me (or supposedly).

What would you do if you were stuck in a job, or I suppose it could be any environment you don't like and know is not right for you, and need to make a change? How would you go about re-discovering your passions and find out what it is you were meant to do with your talents?

[americanoracle]

First congrats on figuring it out soon enough to not lose 20 more years of your life doing something you don't enjoy.

Second, having law degree in hand is a pretty awesome fallback plan, which many of us need to have in place before we can take risks with our future. The reality is most people with good fallback plans never actually use them, they just need them to make the transition.

So, I would encourage you to use that as motivation for taking risk, that you can go back to law whenever you want and make a living if the road less travelled leaves you high and dry. Though it very seldom actually does...so you are off to a good start by asking the excellent question.

I will probably swing by later with thoughts on how to answer it, coincides with a piece I'm writing at the moment so that's cool. Suspect others here will have good thoughts for you as well.

best...

[liam75005]

And what do you enjoy doing outside of work ? What are your hobbies ? What are your passions ?

[robinsoncrusoe]

With law as a fallback plan, I agree that I should be way more bold about my decisions than I currently am. I really have nothing to lose. However, law, as a profession, is very risk-averse and we are taught in school and at work to go with the safest route every time.

Well, I'm not sure what my passions are. I truly thought it was law. I imagined working 80-hour weeks for 5-10 years until I could establish a solid clientele base before launching my own practice or partnership. But this is my parent's dreams. I'll have to confront them about this sooner or later. I've seen too many partners of the firm pass away in their 50's and think that the work-related stresses just never truly go away.

So growing up, I can't remember ever having much downtime to explore other hobbies. If I wasn't preparing for mock trials, I was doing model UN, debate team, LSAT review, or clerking for a judge. I did play a variety of sports, and found that while I enjoy full-contact team sports like hockey and football, I was a better endurance athlete in sports like cross-country, track, crew, and cycling. Also a big fan of surfing, although I just end up as a punching bag for the waves.

I guess I enjoy writing, especially fiction, but maybe that's due to all the writing-intensive classes I've had to take. I love traveling and have frequently imagined myself as foreign reporter or correspondent. Considered going JAG for the Navy at one point but by then, I was already feeling that law was not the right field for me.

I guess what I could do is write up a list of anything that comes to mind regarding hobbies or passions and post them up later. I was also considering doing some traveling around in order to clear my head. It's difficult to soul-search when you live in the jungles of nyc.

[americanoracle]

Hey RC,

Maybe an alternative to listing passions, be more specific and list the things you really want to experience before you die. Then narrow it down to things you want to do this year, today, whenever. I know it's kind of vogue to do bucket lists these days. But evaluating one's life purpose is a major procedure and frought with hurdles (like, maybe you don't even have one).

One of the things I appreciate about T. Ferriss is he doesn't really fit in a box and doesn't try to. He isn't trying to be anyone that I can really identify, he is setting out to do things and then doing them. All kinds of labels are put on him after the fact but that doesn't seem to be in his motivation other than for keeping score in a sporting manner. That's a useful meditation for me.

Also agree with your instinct, being in NYC or any metro that you are immersed in is a tough place to reset your compass. I think you can get a flight the the carib really cheap this time of year, maybe take a week off and go sit on a beach to make the list.

Later...

[robinsoncrusoe]

Hey, that sounds like a great idea. Instead of forcing myself to write down a list of hobbies that I may or may not actually enjoy, I'll ask myself which things I feel I absolutely need to experience before I die. After writing down a few things, I'm sure I'll start to see a pattern, or several big themes pop out, and I can just work from there.

I haven't used any vacation time yet this year, so I think I'll take off for a week beginning in January to go somewhere relaxing. Maybe take some books with me for pleasure reading. It'll take me a few days to get out of "work" mode but I think that by day 3 or 4, I should have a mind clear enough to make some revelatory inroads.

Regarding T. Ferriss: do you think he has some kind of end "goal" or dream that he's currently working towards? He doesn't explicitly cover this, but would he agree that is it important to have some kind of "destination" to keep striving for? The only way I know how "live" is to set a goal and work towards it, but it seems like TF has no explicit grand scheme, other than to figure out the secrets behind doing extraordinary and interesting things. I guess it's another thing for me to ponder during my break.

[americanoracle]

Regarding T. Ferriss: do you think he has some kind of end "goal" or dream that he's currently working towards? He doesn't explicitly cover this, but would he agree that is it important to have some kind of "destination" to keep striving for? The only way I know how "live" is to set a goal and work towards it, but it seems like TF has no explicit grand scheme, other than to figure out the secrets behind doing extraordinary and interesting things.

I would suspect he is wittingly or unwittingly bound for following in Tony Robbins footsteps, maybe sans infomercials. Some poeple are Bill Gates types who just come in and dominate their world and accidently make a lot of people flush along the way. Ferriss banks on helping other people get what they want, pretty much his whole schtick from 4hww to 4hb and between.

Those people can deviate all over the place but eventually they come back to moving the collective ball forward. It's in their nature to help people and they get huge success and gratification from doing so.

As for the goals, what I recall from the 1st book was him saying he didn't know what he wanted to do or be 6 months from now and tended not to plan even that long.

On his blog he talks about it in places, one thing he posted a couple months ago said he was shooting for NYT #1 for the holiday week, which happened a couple days ago. I think not by accident. I think that has been the extent of his grand scheme for awhile, beyond that... doubt he knows.

[MoneyHungry]

I think you are in a dilemma a lot of people go through in their lives. I have an uncle that had the exact same experience as you. Most people that go into law want to make a difference but then realize there is not much good done in the field unless you get into a niche that allows you to do good.

My uncle is 50 years old and is about to become a HS teacher. He made the move a few years back and he seems happier. He still does a little tax law on the side to supplement his income.

I say go for it. you only live once