Critique Landing Pages

[nysee]

I want to get a feel for what a good landing page is, and what would make you guys click the BUY button.

A http://www.cloudninehoodia.com/?__cnai=392075&__cnaci=0008&__cnaci=0002&gclid=CMSG-JyTo5kCFQUwpAodLD-7qQ

VS

B http://www.dietpill1.com/home.html?gclid=CKrzy9yTo5kCFZUwpAodKDlipQ

I like the video on A, but it was a little difficult to navigate especially with the strange locations of the Buy buttons.

B was total crap for me, and I wouldn't trust them at all. That guy Dr. Jiao was clearly fake and the site just looked like a scam to me.

What do you guys and gals think?

[Matthew Connors]

hi nysee

A

Very proffessional initial look

6 ticks with no text

Too much text to dig through to find the benefits and why i need the product,

Id be starting with a big bold statement like

"Hodia - The Secret Tribal Remedy To Control Hunger" in big red

Then in almost as big bold dot points

Suppresses hunger

benefit 2 in big red - add any additional text if you want it thier and feel its necesary in small black on the same line or below each big red benefit

benefit 3

benefit 4

Certified by blah blah

Testimonial 1

Testimaonial 2

testi 3

Then tell us why our problem cannot go untreated

And finish with a strong call to action
The click here image link doesnt work- maybe thats intentianal because you not live yet

B is too busy, the text is too small, theres too many links to distract the buying process

I perosnally wouldnt use either of these as to me they are not landing pages, they are web sites

Landing pages have only one working link and thats the buy now button

Sure use a site like either of these fro your SEO stuff but when you market send them to a dedicated landing page.

This will help, its wrtitten to get optin emails, to get a sale almost the same principles apply
http://www.squidoo.com/squeeze--page

Heres an example I set up yesterday:
http://www.autoincometoday.com/howtofindniche.html

Thats what a proper landing page looks like - The only way out of that page is the back button, my buy now button or an email opt in. And some would argue that i should get rid of the opt in as even its a distraction to the buying process.

[FreedomFinder]

B actually caught my attention better and made me want to stay longer... I liked how the headline makes you think you find some big secret, it's cool. The asian girl on there is cute to.:P

[nysee]

Matthew, great suggestions. It all makes sense, although neither of these are pages that I set up. I am just trying to get a dialogue going about what a good landing page is and what would make YOU click the buy button.

Do old school squeeze pages like that still work? And if they do work, have you tested them up against a more web 2.0 ish site similar to audiomixologist.net ?

To put it a different way, do you think the audiomixologist.net site would sell more in the old school squeeze page, white background multicolored text format than it does in its current state?

@Freedom, you are right, I found myself scrolling the page looking for a full-body picture of her..

nysee