Desperate for adventure

[bipbipx]

Hi,

How do you manage to get lots of travel and adventure into your life after you have started a family, got children and a regular home?

I love my family, but I’m also desperate for some more adventure. Unfortunately my wife doesn’t want to travel as much as I want She’s more into a week or two here and there, while I would love to travel for months at the time.

Taking time off to go on adventure isn’t a problem. I have my own company that I can manage from anywhere in the world (as long as there is internet). My children are 1 and 3 years old.

Have any of you faced similar issues and desperation? How did you manage to get more travel and adventure into your life?

Thanks, Ryan

[earthmother65]

Take a look at a few of the other posts that write about non-supporting spouses and kids - there's some good advice on starting small (i.e., just get used to travelling with two little kids, because it does take some getting used to!) and help your wife start to feel more comfortable about it. It may seem counter-intuitive, but it's actually easier now that your kids are small and totally under your control and influence - once they're like mine (10 & 13), it's a whole other ball game!

[Sven]

Adventure is about story telling. If you have a story to tell, you have experienced an adventure.

Stories are always about the odd things, never about the common stuf. So to create an adventure, do uncommon things. These can be very small and very big.

Step outside the daily, weekly, monthly, yearly and lifetime routine every now and then, it'll do you good.

[parkaboy]

Hi,

How do you manage to get lots of travel and adventure into your life after you have started a family, got children and a regular home?

I love my family, but I’m also desperate for some more adventure. Unfortunately my wife doesn’t want to travel as much as I want She’s more into a week or two here and there, while I would love to travel for months at the time.

Taking time off to go on adventure isn’t a problem. I have my own company that I can manage from anywhere in the world (as long as there is internet). My children are 1 and 3 years old.

Have any of you faced similar issues and desperation? How did you manage to get more travel and adventure into your life?

Thanks, Ryan

Can't you compromise and have one or two 2-month or so adventures per year, and stay in one place the rest of the time?

[kamakiri]

Wake up and smell the coffee buddy. Lets look at this through your wife's eyes.

2008 1 year old child requires constant attention with the added benefit of no sleep.
2007 Pregnant with a child in the terrible 2s requiring constant attention, and some fun hormone changes.
2006 1 year old first child requiring constant attention and no sleep.
2005 Pregnant with all of the fun hormone changes that go along with a first pregnancy.

Get your priorities in order. Try taking both of your kids on a 2 week vacation. See how many times you think about adventure between changing diapers and finding food that a 3 year old will eat in a foreign country.

Is it any surprise at all that she isn't interested in jumping on a plane for 3 months. Maybe you should concentrate on something just a liiittle bit closer to home. Take your wife out to a day spa, get her a pedicure. Make her feel just a little bit human instead of talking about some 'adventure' that she has zero interest or energy for.

[bipbipx]

Thanks for all the replies. I managed to disable subscription to this thread, so I didn't see them before today :(

We have travelled with one small kid already - six weeks in SE Asia where my wife is from. No problems there, travelling with kids is much easier than people think (or at least that's our experience).

I think we will end up with parkaboy's idea about a compromise, where I will be away 2 times a year for a month or so of adventure. It's just that my company gives me unlimited freedom and mobility, so I want to use it :)

Seeing how Tim Ferris travels the world and experience lots of adventure makes me very envious.

I think kamakiri got the wrong impression about all this. My wife is not the only one taking care of the children - actually I'm doing more than her (and loving it) since I'm not bound by office hours and normal work like my wife.

[froldt]

congrats bipbipx on the existing freedom!
My suggestion would be to look for adventure close-to-home. I can travel for less than two hours and:

go rock climbing
learn to sail
explore some world-famous caves
eat at nationally acclaimed restaurants
tour at least 30 vineyards
watch spectacular plays
visit many historical locations

The traveling might be a bit harder to work in, but the adventure is often just a change of view-point. I wasn't aware how many spectacular things were offered in my state, even though I have lived here all of my life. Adventure can be small-scale in effort, but still have a large-scale impact.
If you're closer to home, you will be able to do more things, and it will be easier to take your children/wife with you (at least after you've tried it out initially).

[ActionJ]

Hey,

Another method of travelling close to home you may wish to consider is by RV. My wife and I have been living on one "full-time" for over 2 years, and it is a great lifestyle to experience if you love bbqs, nature, socializing and want to explore North America.
Now we are both under 30 and have met other young people on the road, although most would think you have to wait till you retire to enjoy it. We met a couple in Key West, that were all about the FHWW, who had a 7 year old daughter travel with them (in a 30ft travel trailer with bunks). She was being homeschooled, and as part of her lessons, they would travel to historic points and so on. Talk about the best way to learn about local geography and history.
She was very well adjusted and made friends with other children on the beach. The best part, the family was looking for a sailboat, the next year they were going to sell or trade the RV for a boat and travel through the caribbean.

After reading the book, now I have the itch to go farther, think I'll aim for Australia next year.

Just be creative and the possibilities are endless.

[froldt]

Hey,

Another method of travelling close to home you may wish to consider is by RV. My wife and I have been living on one "full-time" for over 2 years, and it is a great lifestyle to experience if you love bbqs, nature, socializing and want to explore North America.
Now we are both under 30 and have met other young people on the road...

The best part, the family was looking for a sailboat, the next year they were going to sell or trade the RV for a boat and travel through the caribbean.

An RV for full-time living is in the plans for my wife and I. Once we graduate college we want to live/travel in an RV for awhile. We have also discussed living in a sailboat. Eventually we will settle down, and can live in our RV while we build our house. Glad to hear we have good company already, though we are there only in our dreams as of yet.

[lovinglife]

My husband also wants to get an RV. We won't go on the road full-time (have no desire for that) but it will allow us to take longer trips since I can also use it as my office. We have a young child that we also homeschool, so traveling would double as "moving classroom".

[FrozenCanuck]

My kids are not that much older than yours, so I can totally see your point and also your wife's point about not being as interested in travel.

The problem you face soon is school ... so you'll not be able to do extended travel unless you home school or hire teachers where you go. That's possible.

My advice would be to get your WIFE to tell you what her dream trip is. Then plan it. Let her get a dream trip in first, then she will have a HUGE positive anchor about this trip when it comes time for the next one. Let her plan everything from location to activities, to hotels, etc. Help only if she wants. But make this one about her. Being pregnant is no fun and she did it twice, deserves the break.

FC

[ActionJ]

An RV for full-time living is in the plans for my wife and I. Once we graduate college we want to live/travel in an RV for awhile. We have also discussed living in a sailboat. Eventually we will settle down, and can live in our RV while we build our house. Glad to hear we have good company already, though we are there only in our dreams as of yet.

Froldt,
We've been spreading the word of alternative living well before I read the book, just finished it 3 days ago. Our first idea was houseboat/ sailboat but that limited our mobility for going across country, plus we weren't sure how'd we adjust to constant rocking, bad weather, etc.
Then we saw a commercial for RVing and were sold... executed the transition in about 4 months. Our lease was up (in downtown Toronto) and we jumped in head first. The hardest part was condensing all our "junk" to fit in the RV. Eliminated 90% of our stuff, sold it off, donated to goodwill, and the remainder we stored at a friends. Watched Fight Club a few times for motivation. "The things you own end up owning you." Love that quote!

If you need any advice or resources, give me a shout. RV.net has every answer you could possibly think of, and check out nurvers.com, a good friend of mine runs it, we aren't the type to go to bed at sundown.

We haven't had the urge to settle down yet, but try to stay in one place at least a month. The first year doing it, we tried to see and do everything, staying a few days or a week at a place. Take the time to do it right, unless you dislike the campground or your neighbours, then you can take off. ;)